Celebrate self love instead of Valentine’s Day

I’m not single and I am not going to celebrate Valentine’s Day today. Why ?  because love should be celebrated daily, not just particularly on the 14th February. Today I want to inspire you to love, love yourself, take the time to pamper yourself and to look only after you. To all the single women and men, today do something different, crazy, risky to mark this day as the day to differentiate yourself and  do something extraordinary for you, just for you without guilt, hesitation or overanalysis.

To all the single working mums, you are the wonderwomen of our time and I am amazed by your strength, passion and resilience to raise children on your own. To all of you, celebrate self love to always bring the best for your bundle of joy and loved ones. Today is the day where I forgot Mr Valentine to focus on my bundle of joy because she woke up at dawn and needed to be cuddled by her mummy to face the day. She is now sleeping peacefully and this is the reason why I can write this post right now.

This time forget about Mr Valentine and celebrate today as a day for pure self-love.

Credit featured picture : tumblr.com

Open your heart to your Love

After having experienced  a real rollercoaster in so many aspects of my life, I didn’t expect that this time, I will be challenged again, this time on an emotional level. We have to fight on so many levels that we can be lose sight of the most important one : Our love. Not in the sense that we are not paying attention to him but by the fact, that we focus so much on our baby that we do not realise that our man needs attention as well. It’s hard to be there for everyone : your man, family, friends and I truly think, as a woman we are trying our best. But especially between work, family matters, appointments, a fridge and washing machine broken, arrangements possibly for Christmas holiday, and be there to attend Parent meeting regularly, you can feel that something is not right but not necessarily resolve it immediately… because we are patient. We truly understand that nobody is perfect and we are all human, we are not robots.

It’s when I reached my boundaries that I say no. And this is also where I learned that saying no can be really hard. Because we know it’s going to create a reaction and we are looking for it. Because it’s time to speak up. It is where I was challenged, not to use my normal objective mindset (i.e. go straight to the point) and resolve the issue logically and move on from it. This time, it was deeper, dangerous in the sense I needed to open my heart and explain how I feel. Oh boy, as women, we are the master to communicate our feelings but at first , I just wanted to scream and let go of my anger, frustration, and ultimately disappointment. I did it in a certain manner because I cried, I needed to let go, I needed to express my emotions, I knew it was necessary. Vulnerability is not my forte but I learned that without it, there is no self-improvement to be stronger, wiser and happier. And me, being usually feisty, expecting to argue to prove I am right managed this time to just speak, explain, communicate in a calm manner because I wanted to understand. I wanted to know whether I missed something, whether my intuition was right… and boy, I was right, not feeling victorious at all but emotionally moved. I still am because it’s a wake up call to stay kind to each other, because we all react differently to go through difficult times.

As I previously said, vulnerability is not my forte but I learned by opening my heart, explain how I feel that I was able to re-connect with my hubby emotionally and this is something I will never forget. So, if you are engulfed in your emotional bubble, delve into your feelings to be able to communicate and open your heart to your Love.

Credit featured picture : jaminpaul.tumblr.com

 

Keep the flame alive

A nice walk, a nice meal where you can take the time to enjoy your food, look at the person in front of you, listen to this person and noticed some little things. His broad shoulders, his grey eyes, his features which make you realise that the guy in front of you is handsome and this, this is pretty awesome. It has been for ages that I went to the restaurant with my man and this is too damn long. It occurs to me that it’s really essential to take care of your couple with some little touches like going to the restaurant, go to the cinema, do things together. All of us need some time with our loved ones and we shouldn’t be forget the importance of it.

I do remember that my manager used to tell me to look after my hubby, to have some quality time with him, to do not forget him when I came back from my maternity leave. I used to brush away this piece of advice because I was so intensely focused on my daughter, everything I wanted was her wellbeing and happiness and I was running like a chicken trying to juggle everything. But she was right. It is crucial to keep the flame alive, to carve out some quality time with your man, to feel a couple again. It is so good. So liberating to have this time together for a few hours. Take the time for it. It is already difficult to find the One, don’t lose him by lack of attention and love. Keep the flame alive.

Credit featured picture : whitney carson.com

No regrets

online.wsj.com
online.wsj.com

De temps en temps, je me souviens de ma vie avant d’avoir ma fille… c’est un peu comme un blur mais ce qui me marque c’est d’avoir raté souvent des opportunités par faute de temps. Pourtant je n’ai aucun regret, je considère que j’ai profité de chaque instant et qu’il était venu le moment d’accueillir un bout de chou dans notre couple.

Je n’aurai pas pensé que je refuserai un bon resto ou une soirée entre amis… et pourtant l’attrait de ces évènements ne me fait aucun effet, pourquoi? parce que je sais que je n’aurai pas le temps d’apprécier ou de déguster avec gourmandise le repas devant moi ou pouvoir participer aux conversations animées parce que je serai en train de surveiller ma fille du coin de l’oeil pour éviter qu’elle mette tout ce qui est à sa portée à sa bouche. Pour autant , je n’ai aucun ressentiment parce que j’adore ma fille, mon homme et passer du temps avec eux. C’est une période qui je suis persuadée me manquera quand elle sera une adolescente et ne voudra même pas me faire un bisou avant d’aller rejoindre son groupe de copines…c’est pour ça que je ne regrette rien, la comble de bisous et de câlins et passe beaucoup de temps avec elle.

Je pense que j’apprécie avec plus d’intensité de faire ce que je veux quand j’ai un peu de temps libre : lire un livre, un magasine, faire un masque, prendre une douche en prenant mon temps, me faire un bain, partir en weekend avec des amies, aller à un nouveau cours de yoga, jouer avec ma fille.Tous ces petits moments enrichissent ma vie de milles et une façons et m’aident à réaliser que ma vie comme elle est me rend heureuse. Bien sûr, nous désirons toujours plus mais n’est-ce pas reposant de temps en temps d’apprécier juste ce qu’on a et d’en profiter pleinement ?!

Il est évident que ma lifestyle  a radicalement changé mais elle me va très bien comme ça. Je vais à l’essentiel, je ne perds pas mon temps en prises de tête et j’avance au rythme que je le souhaite…et franchement ça fait un bien fou ! oui un bien fou d’avoir atteint cet équilibre en tant que maman, femme et jeune femme moderne.Je ne vise plus la perfection, c’est plutôt l’imperfection qui me rend plus accessible… et j’ai arrêté de mettre la barre trop haut. Pourquoi ? parce qu’il est temps de comprendre que le jour où vous réalisez qu’il ne sert rien de courir, tout se met en place doucement et sûrement.