After having experienced a real rollercoaster in so many aspects of my life, I didn’t expect that this time, I will be challenged again, this time on an emotional level. We have to fight on so many levels that we can be lose sight of the most important one : Our love. Not in the sense that we are not paying attention to him but by the fact, that we focus so much on our baby that we do not realise that our man needs attention as well. It’s hard to be there for everyone : your man, family, friends and I truly think, as a woman we are trying our best. But especially between work, family matters, appointments, a fridge and washing machine broken, arrangements possibly for Christmas holiday, and be there to attend Parent meeting regularly, you can feel that something is not right but not necessarily resolve it immediately… because we are patient. We truly understand that nobody is perfect and we are all human, we are not robots.
It’s when I reached my boundaries that I say no. And this is also where I learned that saying no can be really hard. Because we know it’s going to create a reaction and we are looking for it. Because it’s time to speak up. It is where I was challenged, not to use my normal objective mindset (i.e. go straight to the point) and resolve the issue logically and move on from it. This time, it was deeper, dangerous in the sense I needed to open my heart and explain how I feel. Oh boy, as women, we are the master to communicate our feelings but at first , I just wanted to scream and let go of my anger, frustration, and ultimately disappointment. I did it in a certain manner because I cried, I needed to let go, I needed to express my emotions, I knew it was necessary. Vulnerability is not my forte but I learned that without it, there is no self-improvement to be stronger, wiser and happier. And me, being usually feisty, expecting to argue to prove I am right managed this time to just speak, explain, communicate in a calm manner because I wanted to understand. I wanted to know whether I missed something, whether my intuition was right… and boy, I was right, not feeling victorious at all but emotionally moved. I still am because it’s a wake up call to stay kind to each other, because we all react differently to go through difficult times.
As I previously said, vulnerability is not my forte but I learned by opening my heart, explain how I feel that I was able to re-connect with my hubby emotionally and this is something I will never forget. So, if you are engulfed in your emotional bubble, delve into your feelings to be able to communicate and open your heart to your Love.
Credit featured picture : jaminpaul.tumblr.com